day 4: you will be able to guess which one of these people is me after reading this entry.
i planned to stay low. but...
"changed completely and seemed like you are not yourself."
"you seemed to know almost everything."
"are you actually one of the instructor here?"
"Takashi Jack Sparrow."
"Takashi, what are we going to do now?"
"Takashi, where are we going to put this?"
"Takashi, this... Takashi, that... Takashi, bla bla bla..."
"are you dating The Equipment Manager?"
"so your boss sent you here, i thought that you came to accompany your boyfriend."
(~.~)
...
and so right after Eid on Aug 4 to Aug 10 i went for a short course at Outward Bound School, Lumut, Perak, Malaysia with the equipment manager. only the both of us is from the training company. the rest, 70+ of them are from a short government course before they are posted to any suitable position in the government.
Day 1
The Equipment Manager & i introduced ourselves to the course director while waiting for the 70+ of the others. we told them that we are also instructors and we are used to kayaking and i went for a PWC expedition.
not much. registration & administration. rules & regulations. dividing the participants in watches (groups). handing over foods, phones, IDs, wallet, car keys, and wallets. selecting managers, assistant managers and logistics. briefly introducing ourselves, and The Watch Instructor (WI) asked if i am an instructor too. settling down in dorms, dinner, night ice breaking; which i told everyone in my watch that i have a thick and firm wall between me and everyone in my life; that i will always hope that they are the ones who will be trying to break the wall.
WI teach us a little bit about whaler (bow, stern, port side, starboard side) and asked me if i know them. no i dont. i just know how to run things. i seldom know the name of things. then he asked if anyone knows how to use a compass; and i slightly put my hand up and it ended up i am the only one who knows how to use them.
Day 2
morning exercise, suddenly everyone knows me.
one more time, i was asked by the WI if i know how to knot. no i dont. and i dont even know the names of the knots. i dont knots. i never knot. but i can really say i am a fast learner. i can knot by myself just by looking how knots are done by the WI. seeing this (maybe), one of the members wanted to book me to be his partner for kayak expedition.
assembling dome tent, yes. but this time the WI asked if anyone know how to assemble a dome tent and only few of us put our hands up including me. and so i was assigned by the manager of the day to set camp site up for the day after.
whaler expedition practice. learned how to assemble & disassemble, adjusting sails, commands and i mostly did the rowing. jump off mother boat and climbing up again for water confidence, etc..
whaler watch self practice at night. they decided that i should be the navigator & rower; and another girl as captain. i began showing what i am as i taught them on how to row.
my wall begins to crumble a little bit on the top.
Day 3 (i am the manager)
morning exercise (supposedly but we immediately head for breakfast instead), some of the guys said that they voted of which of them deserves me as their kayak partner.
whaler expedition to camp site, i mostly sat at the tiller at the stern, giving command and seemed to be taking over the captain position; especially when the WI left us by our own and stay on the mother boat.
when we reached the campsite, still in the whaler, more of me continued to show when i began to instruct and give opinions which they mostly agreed on; and on the campsite especially, when i have sufficient experience in camping when i was in grade school, and also with my Waterfall mates (dang they organized Eid open house at Kedondong when i was here!!!!)
that night the WI asked us to tell everyone what we contribute during our expedition and asked me to handover my position of 'captain' & tiller to another person so that i can row.
feel kind of bad because we planned to wake up early morning at 4am to make breakfast because we are leaving at 7am the day after, but my watch mates finished cooking after midnight, just before the storm came in.
Day 4
whaler expedition back to base. as planned, i no longer hold the tiller at first and i myself planned that i want to sit at the rower seat. but just as i climb on board, the seats are full and i am stuck at the stern, and the other person assigned to take care of the tiller was already there.
then suddenly the captain said,"Takashi, give command."
a little later the person assigned to the tiller said that she can no longer handle the tiller because of seasickness. and so i am the 'captain' again; at least i am learning to be one. to look at the wind, to give commands, to make decision of which way the sail should be, of either we should row or we should just depend on the wind.
again, especially when the WI left us by our own, i was rowing and another guy was learning how to handle the tiller. and when i asked if he wants to row instead; he said yes and hand over the tiller to me.
i went off route at first; and had the WI yelled at me from the mother boat: "Takashi! you really need to take care to the tiller! dont let go!"
another guy from my watch also wanted me to be his partner for kayak.
i begin to feel sick of people depending on me too much.
wall crumbled more and showed my forehead to my eyes.
Day 5
kayak practice in the morning, there are 6 gentlemen & 9 ladies in our watch. the WI asked the gentlemen to line in a row and the ladies to choose and partner with the gentlemen. the other guy from the day before started calling my name; but then the WI said: "dont concern much about Takashi. she is used to kayaking. she will partner with another single kayak for the expedition later."
and so i am safe for this round. i started to think i'd rather be alone than stuck with someone who would hold me down. we began to practice on what to do in case of capsized kayak; and the WI chose to capsize with me. thanks to the crumbled wall.
and as mentioned, i was partnered with a girl from another watch. and i ended up rowing alone at the back, while the girl is busy with her camera and her low level of physical strength.
we went trekking to camp site in the evening; unload our camping equipment from the mother boat. and here we go again. most of the decisions and actions are on me. where to set up tents, where to start fire, starting fire; except for cooking. i dont make food. i just dont. i will only make food that if i dont, i will die.
and i began whining to my watch mates. and my watch mates began whining to me and each other.
i saw a ghost, that looks like white Cheshire Cat; twice.
wall showed my head. yes, i begin to show them some of what i really am; especially when the WI is late for about 1/2 hour for our nightcap. we sang together and lay on the tent sheet together. slept late after chit chatting with the other watch and the WI who came later.
Day 6
lead trekking back to kayak base, kayak expedition back to base. i can no longer tolerate with my kayak partner and began to force her to row. from about 20% rowing the day before, she increased her rowing to 50% this day.
became stressed that the WI said each member in our watch is compulsory to cook rice for solo camp afterwards.
preparation for solo camp. played Hot Seat game, which these people arent being honest enough (that when we came back from this activity some of them in my dorm are still talking about someone behind his back).
trekking to solo camp site. set up tent, look for firewood, which is not much, but enough for me to cook instant noodle (compulsory to cook rice my arse~ leave the unnecessary things be please~ for me it is enough to just have something to eat. it is the wilderness dang it whataya expect?) and boil water for a cup of instant coffee.
wrote a letter for my future self (compulsory and will be sent to the address written on the envelope about 6 months later), went to sleep at about 9.30 pm. just as i began to doze off at about 10.30 pm (i guess), the WI woke me up asking if i have already eaten and written my letter. i said yes and he told me to go back to sleep.
but i cant sleep. the moon is too bright and it shined right on my face and there are many weird sound, sound of people running, the sound that sounds like "kroink kroink kroink" a boar i think, sound of people chanting, sounded like it was going to rain, and i cant wait for my watch to turn 5.30 am.
Day 7
5.30 am, i boil some water for a cup of Milo. i packed my things and we began trekking back to base. trekking back to base. we were the earliest to reach the base camp so we had more time to clean up.
closing ceremony. sing. bought souvenirs. exchange phone numbers. joined whatsapp group. went back to Puchong.
...
"... like a dragon."
you really have no idea of what i REALLY am.
should i change from Takashi (喬士) to Ryu (龍) by the way?
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