Lies ~ 3: I am an Iban

i went to a training and spoke Manglish / Chinglish in my presentation;

as usual.

when we have our lunch break,

some of the participants come to sit with me and my partner.

we talked and talked 

♫ ♩ about how our parents will die ♪ ♬

hush, Fun!

when suddenly one of the participants asked:

"Gun, where are you from?"

before i can answer, my partner said:

"Gun is an Iban."

i just SMILED; and the participants said:

"oh, no wonder you speak like the east Malaysian people."

...

my language set up in my brain can easily be hacked.

which means;

if i were to become friends with those who are from different states,

i can easily adapt to speaking their dialect.

i can always tell people that i was born in Kuala Lipis, Pahang.

but then my family moved to Temerloh, still in Pahang;

and i went to a boarding highschool which most of my classmates are from Kelantan & Terengganu.

after i graduated highschool, while waiting for college results, my family moved to Kuantan, Pahang.

after a year or two in college we moved to Johor.

and while in college, my best buddies are from Kuala Lumpur, Kedah, Pahang, Kelantan and Johor. 

i am working now. 

most of my coworkers are Malaysian Chinese. 

they speak Manglish most of the time;

and when i speak Manglish, i sounded like East Malaysian people;

or when my skin was darker people thought that i am Chindian;

because i sometimes speaks a little Mandarin & Cantonese.

Pahang, Kelantan, Terengganu, Johor, Kedah & Kuala Lumpur have different dialect each;

and please take note that in Pahang, 

Kuala Lipis, Temerloh, and Kuantan have different dialect each.

and i always use my ability to speak in Terengganu dialect 

every time i went there.

so why am i not telling the truth, you ask?

let me ask you this:

"would you prefer me to explain my whole life - how my family have been moving here and there; and how i met my friends in college; and how do i do at work now? 

or would you prefer me to just SMILE?"

well for me,

i have met a lot of people who asked me the same question;

and i hate to explain my whole life over and over again.

so i prefer to just smile and get everything over with.

Too Many Language ~ 6

i said "hey, can you help me pick some 'po-tang'?" while pointing to the potatoes at a hypermarket.

he replied "if you want to speak in English, say 'po-ta-to'. if you want to speak in Bahasa, say 'ken-tang'. there is no such thing as 'po-tang', gun."

we went back and later that afternoon i texted him asked if he want to go out to see Putrajaya Floria, even though i have seen them the night before.

he replied "nah. haze made me sometimes dont want to go outside."

i read 'haze' as 'ハゼ'.

sigh~

Too Many Language ~ 5: Troublemaker by Olly Murs

Bangi...

again...

sigh~

...

i am learning a new set of language.

medical terms.

among them is:

(acute) myocardial infarction - heart attack.

so every time i am listening to:

i started singing like:

why does it feels so good but hurts so bad

my mind keeps saying run as fast as you can

i say i'm done but when you pull me back

i swear you're giving me a

myocardial infarction

troublemaker!

Too Many Lanugage ~ 4

my colleague get to teach people from Saudi Arabia last few weeks.

he told me he learned two Arabic words:

'kalas' which means 'done';

and 'la' which means 'no'.

i am not sure if is it correct.

i taught a petroleum company once,

and in their group, there were 1 person from egypt.

and 2 persons from Pakistan.

so actually, i do learn some Pakistani.

based on DRCAB,

English - Bahasa Melayu - Pakistani

Danger - Bahaya - Khatara

Response - Tindak Balas - Pratikriya

Chest Compression - Tekanan Dada/ Pam - Dabava

Airway - Saluran Pernafasan/ Nafas - Sans

Breathing - Hembusan/ Cium - Chumi

... 

but that is not all of it.

my ex colleague posted this on her FB timeline:

oh, God why?

5 different languages in one class?

i'd kill myself if i were to encounter this.

Too Many Language ~ 3

when i was still studying in college,

i have a Pakistani friend;

which i have forgotten his name.

sigh~ forgotten 

again.

once, i was not feeling well. 

he saw me and asked something like: "are you ok? what is wrong with you?"

i answered: "netsu (熱 - heat)."

which comes from 発熱 (fever). 

then i took some time and tell him i got a fever.

it is a reflects;

that sometimes the word in your mother tongue 

or in English just wont come out.

just like when i was in the aircraft company,

on the second day there,

while waiting for all of them to come,

some of them came in and greeted each other

who sat on the same table i am sitting in:

"jou san (cantonese)."

even i was playing pc game that time,

i automatically replied the same;

because i got used to greet everyone in office the same

almost every morning.

i never get to learn Pakistani though.

Too Many Language ~ 2

at the aircraft engineering company, 

my partner also said to me

by the way, you speak more English than Malay.

yes, i might have been using too many language. 

i speak different language to different people.

Too Much of English ~ 2

1 here

...

after the golf club,

i went to an aircraft engineering company;

and told the security

"morning, kami ada first aid training." (morning, we have a first aid training)

and the security told us something like the person in charge of the training didnt sent them any email, so we are not allowed to go in. they asked us to call to the person in charge.

so we called but no one pick up the phone.

then somehow i heard that another security said

"diorang ni pengajar untuk kelas pertolongan cemas!"

which means "they are the trainers for the first aid class!"

then the first security acknowledged

"oh, pertolongan cemas!"

which means "oh, first aid!"

...

afterwards, my partner that day gave me a tip;

that if i were to talk to a Malay, speak Malay first.

if they were to reply you in English, then only you can speak English.

if not people will think that you are acting proud, stuck up or arrogant.

and not many people are well educated in English.

well next time,

im gonna be more careful.

because i would never have thought that

some people out there do not know what "first aid" is.

they only know "pertolongan cemas".

btw my brain is still not satisfied.

why the heck some people out there do not know what "first aid" is?

even if it is English, it is kind of a common term.

did they really never heard of "first aid"?

not even once?

Too Many Language

my mother tongue is Bahasa Melayu.

i can give myself 8 out of 10 for my fluency in speaking English. 

i started to learn Japanese informally by watching anime & listening to songs since i was 14.

i then started to learn some Korean words - swear words especially - when i was 19.

when i came to work to where i am working now, i started to learn some Mandarin & Cantonese.

i always mix three languages in one sentence.

be it leaving a comment on FB;

or talking to my friends.

something like...

"nanti i ask him to dabao for you"

nanti means later in Bahasa Melayu.

dabao means take away in Chinese; i am not sure if its Mandarin or Cantonese.

some people think i am a mix of Chinese & Indian because of my Manglish or Singlish slang and my Malay looks.

and its becoming worse compared to last time.

ending this topic today, i present to you:

♪♫ i wanna fuck you in the ass~ ♫♪